Misclaimer **

This Blog is a work of true stories with some pinches of pure imagination. The readers of this blog must be above the age of 3 years to understand the message conveyed. Any similarity with any event any person living or dead is possible as there are many things which are real. The author also seeks readers with some difference in their thoughts as normal people will find this blog uninteresting. Above all the spelling and grammatical mistakes must be ignored. After reading this Misclaimer if anyone is still interested in the blog welcome to world of MOMO. It’s going to be fun.

** Copywrong 2008 by author any unauthorized copying, broadcasting and publicity will be highly appreciated.

Monday, January 26, 2009

MOMO back in Town ! Strangely...

It’s been a long time I am out of bloging. In fact I could not write anything because there was absolutely nothing to write. MOMO and I had an ugly fight over the copyright of his life. In spite of the “Misclaimer” he believes that those post are an infringement to his personal life and I paid no royalty too. I lost the battle and stopped writing.

But it was MOMO who called me up a week before to give me permission to write again about his “copyrighted” life. (By the way anyone from you guys only had informed him otherwise I keep secrets well [: p]). He has now completed his MBA in Marketing and believes that there is huge potential for MOMO to become a “Global Brand”. After completing his MBA, strangely he uses some words I feel, are different.

Last time he told me that the SERVICES provided by the banks are their PRODUCTS and the PACKED DINNER which is delivered everyday in my place is a SERVICE!! Now I understood what they teach you in a B-School.
Anyway did you know most of the NEWS we read in news paper everyday are called STORY and are publicity materials, even the business news!!! I don’t believe in such rubbish. He even told all the SALEs are actually only SELL.

In light of all the examples I understood that he has completely lost his mind and nothing can be done now. But!! Wait. The craziest is still to come. He says he knows the best way to beat the GLOBAL RECESSION (Global recession is a situation where your boss realizes that you do nothing in the office and kick you out. This happened globally all of a sudden). Oh again I lost track. According to him the best way is we all should BUY more.

Ok guys nothing I can do for my friend. But I will be grateful if you could find any way to CURE him.

Saturday, June 21, 2008


Momo is confused(?)

Yesterday I saw him wearing a T-Shirt which reads"I am tagged,plz HELP"

So I took the help of Sayani and helped him tackling this crisis .

As per the rule the three mistakes to be done are

1) Take the nearest book lying beside.

2)Read three lines from 5th sentence of page 123.

3)Lead five more people to crisis

MOMO asked is this tagging created to promote "crisis management" ?

Anyway the only book with Momo is "the 3 mistakes of my life" (by Chetan Bhagat)

page 123

" He is an ex-district level player.

'Great . I will see you then',Mrs Ganguly said and left us to

ponder over her business proposition. "

The next 5 sufferers are:

1) Shekhar
2) rim
4) Na.Su. Krishnan
5)White Rose

All five and those visiting please forgive

Friday, May 23, 2008

Scientist MOMO

From our childhood days MOMO was interested in science. He was the one in our class-II who discovered the technology of battery light. We were astonished with his self-made gadget with two batteries, one torch bulb and complex network of wires. It was his old launch box which used to glow when opened. Wow!!

Time to time he built different things and I was one of the privileged to attain his lunch time lectures on science. (Though later we came to know that the theories were not developed by him. Only he used to read some science magazines. It was very rare as we lived in a very remote town)

It was 1996-97 and we were in class VIII when the revolution came. He discovered the most important and useful material “Single use Invisible Ink” code named MAK (Magic Kaali. Kaali means ink in Bengali). The feature of the ink is it is invisible normally. It surfaces only if the paper is soaked in water. Most important if you soak it next time hardly anything is visible. (I will share the technique later).

MAK was an instant hit among us. We used to spend our whole day practicing. We were convinced about its enormous potential. Hidden messages, Chits (OOPS!), Secrets, even some considered it for their personal Dairies (That’s practically impossible as process is good for small texts). However MOMO had something bigger in his mind.

Here you need to know that there was a girl in our class but in other school. She was gorgeous and incidentally the first crush of many of us including MOMO. Her name was (actually is) HSBC or officially HanSika BhattaCharya. (Hey Hansika we are still friends ok). We knew her for almost for a year but none had any idea how to express their feeling. In a bright sunny day MOMO left his first love letter in her bag while we were writing notes in tuition class.

We along with MOMO waited for two weeks for any reaction. Nothing Happened. The year got over and we were promoted to new class. After vacations we came to know that Hansika’s father got transferred to Calcutta (Now Kolkata). We used to discuss a lot about our unfinished plans and probabilities. We also asked MOMO what he wrote in his letter. He never revealed.

Only after we got into college he told me that he wrote a poem to HSBC in MAK. I asked then why do you think she had not replied. He said, “Actually I forgot to mention the process to read the letter and she was not aware of MAK. Also I had met her once before she left. She told me that she was very irritated to find some bunch of useless blank paper in her bag. She knew it was me who left it. And she forgave me because anyway she was leaving the place.” Then MOMO burst out in laughter and lectured, “Look I have learnt a very good thing from the incident (or accident). Never in your life complicate things when it can be done in a simpler way.”

N.B: Hansika those were not bunch of useless blank papers but were innocent feelings of many compiled by MOMO.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

MOMO dreams Six Pack

Films have the greatest impact on MOMO. There are innumerable examples. He studied Mechanical Engineering after watching R.H.T.D.M (A movie where the hero was Mechanical Engineer for 10 minutes). So no wonder when he came to me couple of months back saying he needs a “six pack Ab” like Shah Rukh Khan in Om Shanti Om!!!

For the four years during our college time (2001-05) he had a strange feeling that every girl looks at his Ab (Tummy of 36 Inches). However he never bothered and always believed that he is from a well fed family that’s all. Now suddenly the film made him realize that his Ab is the only reason of his getting less number (0) of girls (Only friends plz) as compared to me.

We stated to look for a good gym for him. He flatly rejected three gyms just because he felt that the instructors were looking at his Ab during our conversation. Finally he enrolled in a gym where the instructor was not present that time. His timing was between 6-8 am. I looked at him for a reason only known to us. He smiled back in confidence and said “I will be in time”.

It’s been some time and I almost forgot to ask him about his fitness program until one day we went for shopping and he was trying a pair of jeans and it was not fitting. The attendant at store measured his waist, it was 35 inches!!! As soon as we get out of the store I said, “Oh! Man you lost an inch. So you are going to gym regularly.” His prompt reply was, “I am doing it at my place; I left the gym within a week of joining without refund.”

I was confused and asked for an elaborate explanation. He explained… “It was the first day in gym and I saw a poster where it was written ‘there is great power in visualization and you get great results by just visualizing what you want to do’. After two days in gym I felt that I am only torturing my body and wasting good sleep. Now I have allotted the time of 6-8 am for visualization. In sleep I dream of a great “workout” and “six packs”. That’s the reason for this great result. It will take a few months to get it and I have already increased my sets and weight.”

He was looking serious.

Can anyone give me a real explanation of his waist reduction? (I 'll also try!!) . I know he is not on diet. Just after shopping we went for Dinner and he had his favorite cheese pizza family size without sharing.

Friday, May 9, 2008

Murder by MOMO

It was a bright Sunday morning and as usual my cell started its crazy frog song to disturb my sleep. Irritated I picked up the phone and I was frightened to hear the trembling voice of MOMO on the other side. (By the way MOMO is my childhood friend MOni MOhon Sarkar. We both are Bengali.)

With some worst anticipation, I asked MOMO what happened. He said, “I finally murdered it”. I was shocked and shouted “what are you talking”. He told that he is coming to my place within 5 minutes and hanged up.

I was preparing for worst I even thought how I could be related to the murder. Childhood friends, same college, same girls (Oops), oh my God too many reasons…..
I knew it was inevitable. He never missed any opportunity to make my life hell and surprise me with his wired thoughts.

Here he comes. He sat on sofa settled himself (while my heart was racing in anxiety) and finally broke the silence, “I murdered my Cell Phone brutally; first I broke its display with a screw driver. Then I stabbed it till I made 5 pieces out of it”.

I was angry and amused at the same time. I simply asked “why?”
(He always has his reasons). He told that the cell phone was disturbing his life. Lately he was planning the murder and now finally did it perfectly. ……
Are you all sympathizing with him thinking that too many calls are behind my distressed friend
But no, don’t judge my friend so conventionally ……..

The real problem with the phone was he was not getting enough calls. Everyday he gets only 10-15 calls from some banks for credit cards or from the service provider asking for payment of Bills and new schemes.

Amazed I asked how he is feeling now and he promptly answered relaxed, tensed, free, nervous, peaceful and irritated (What??).
Really MOMO did that and it’s been two months he is living without a cell phone (Brave Son of India). As per his estimation he only missed two appointments and three birthday parties and 150 undisturbed lunches and dinners. Not bad. He now depends on mail and office phone (Sorry MOMO I hope his Boss not reading it!!!!).

So if you have anything to say to him use your keyboard. J